posted by marc tytus   posted on 10.11.08

Time-lapse from a party we had for our roommate this Saturday. Don’t worry, the guy who threw up has recovered.

posted by marc tytus    posted on 05.11.08 Showers

Don’t worry; though most of my essays are quite controversial, I won’t be going into showers vs. baths.

In elementary school, someone on the school bus was accusing me of taking cold showers. I retorted saying I once took a shower so hot I collapsed when I got out of the shower. A small exaggeration, yes, but I do remember that one time.

I kill so much time in the shower. I have no concept of time once I enter the shower vortex. Unless I go in with the intention to take a fast shower, I feel like I could spend hours in there.

It’s weird to think what I do in the shower. I’ll soap myself up… shampoo. But most of time time is just spent standing under the hot water. I spend too much time just standing there. I guess that’s what you call procrastinating on life.

To be more productive in the shower though, I recently started brushing my teeth. Not an uncommon thing, but apparently it was a little bewildering to those I share my shower with. Next step is to find a suitable a mirror to put in there so I can shave as well. I have a lot of my great ideas while I’m just standing in the shower idle. That’s why this waterproof notepad appealed to me. I don’t think there’s much else I could do to be more productive.

The idea that inspired this post was me wondering if there were people who stood in the shower as they turned on the water, or if everyone turns the shower on and waits for it to warm up before stepping in (even if the wait is only moments.)

There’s nothing worse than cold showers. They are so rough. My family can attest to the number of cold showers we had to take growing up because of our boiler frequently breaking.

I think saying “warm showers” should be a new way to wish people well.

Warm showers everyone.

Figured I’d throw up a link to some photos I took at last night’s Halloween party. (SFW!) posted by marc tytus   posted on 01.11.08

Figured I’d throw up a link to some photos I took at last night’s Halloween party. (SFW!)

posted by marc tytus posted by a friend    posted on 30.10.08 Kyiv, Ukraine

I am so happy to have been given the pleasure of posting this essay from Ahren Brunow, who is a very good friend of both Mike and I, and who is also a University of Guelph undergrad. Thanks, Ahren, for writing this extremely amusing piece and I’m really glad to have given you a place to publish it. Can’t wait to read more of your adventures… — Marc

I have been living abroad in Ukraine for 2 months now. I came here to study economics at the Kyiv School of Economics, which is a Master’s Program here and it has been a little more intense than I had hoped, but it’s a good challenge.  That aside, it has been a very rewarding trip and I have seen a lot and learned a lot.  But being away from home for 2 months, away from friends, family, and loved ones can be hard, but it has made me realize, even more, how truly important these people are to my life.

downtown kyiv
First Day in Kyiv

This has been my first time in a country where for the most part no one speaks English.  It has been quite interesting.  I thought I would write about a couple of interesting events that have happened to myself and my friends due to our inability to speak either Ukrainian or Russian (in Kyiv they speak both languages).  These things have been frustrating, but now I look back on them and laugh and realize how much of a better communicator I am now having been through them.

1) I went through this one solo when I first arrived in Kyiv (Ukraine’s capital).  I arrived at Boryspol Airport ready for my adventure at approximately 1 am on a Tuesday.  I was supposed to look for someone with a sign to pick me up, but after searching for an hour there was no sign of this person.  Hmm?  That is strange I say to myself.  I decide that the person must be late.  So I wait and wait and wait.  Now it is approximately 4 am.  That is 3 hours of sitting in an airport (standing actually as Boryspol only has about 50 chairs, which were all spoken for).  I am pretty disgruntled at this point.  What should I do?  My first thought?  I should go back home…but this wasn’t going to happen.  The school had made arrangements for me to stay somewhere, but I had no clue where.  I didn’t want to venture out to the city, with 4 months worth of luggage and no way to communicate.  I couldn’t call the school because it was 4 am.  Then it finally hits me like a ton of bricks.  I told the school I would arrive on Wednesday (remember it is Tuesday).  DAMMIT.  Now I had been standing and walking aimlessly around tiny Boryspol for about 4 hours and had completely memorized the whole building and begun to truly hate it.  I begin to wonder when anyone will be back at the school… probably 8 - 8:30 am at the earliest.  3 more hours.  Well I might as well start to look for the school’s phone number, which I had seemed to misplace (awesome).  That seems about right given the events up to this point.  New plan, find the school’s number.  An easy task that I think I can complete, what do you think?  I begin asking people as there are no phone books and no internet.  No one speaks English (apparently Boryspol is an international airport) and there goes any chance of finding the number.  Taking a flight home now becomes a viable option given my plight.  I wait for another few hours.  8 am finally comes; 7 hours of standing and experiencing every emotion except happiness.  An internet cafe opens; happiness comes.  I find the school’s number and believe nothing can go wrong now.  I will call the school and tell them about the mix up and they will pick me up.  I go to the pay phone.  Dial the number.  It doesn’t work.  Happiness fades.  In Ukraine you have to dial a plethora of area codes before the actual number.  I discover this after scouring through my Let’s Go Eastern Europe guide (my Bible).  Finally I get through to the school.  I start to speak, but apparently they couldn’t hear me on the other end.  The pay phone only had one tiny minuscule hole to speak into…great design.  After a few more tries eventually someone hears enough to understand.  A few hours later someone arrives and picks me up.  It is now 1 pm.  12 hours of standing.  A truly wonderful start to the trip.  I can laugh at this now…thank god.  When you are going somewhere plan better than me.

boryspol airport inside
Boryspol Airport

2) This story is a great one and really showcases how different Ukraine is from Canada.  After staying in a temporary apartment for a few nights, the four of us needed to find an apartment to live in.  We found one fairly easily, although it was a very bureaucratic process, meaning it was loaded with paperwork (this sums up Ukraine).  Our landlord tells us he is going to give the place a thorough clean and that at night we can back to move in.  Sounds pretty good.  We go exploring and come back at night.  We try to open the door, but the second lock, which we didn’t have a key for yet, was locked.  Our landlord told us he wouldn’t lock this one.  It is 1 am and we have no one to call.  We go to the lady at the front desk (I say front desk, but it is just this barred off box with a bed where a lady sleeps) and we try to explain the situation to her, but she only speaks Ukrainian, as we expected.  After about 45 minutes of explaining she finally understands our dilemma.  She tries to help open the door, but without the key it is hopeless.  By now I was getting ready to sleep on the cold concrete floor outside our door.

apt entrance
Outside our Apartment Door.

The lady goes to talk to the super of the building who doesn’t seem too happy to have been woken.  He finally calls our landlord.  We find out our landlord wasn’t at home and that he didn’t want to wake his wife to come bring us the key (someone who overheard and spoke English told us this).  Why?  We paid for an apartment we can’t even get into?  His solution?  Call his father-in-law and get him to pick us up and have us stay at his father-in-law’s apartment.  This is the truth.  We are all pretty astounded that he won’t get his wife to bring the key.  Finally his father-in-law comes.  In a Lada, a Russian made car, which is probably one of the least safe cars I have had the pleasure of driving in.

russian lada
Sturdy Russian Built Lada.

Needless to say we arrived alive at his place after a very bumpy ride.  I forgot to mention that we cannot communicate at all with this guy (great awkward silences).  He shows us the kitchen and gives us some food, which we were very excited for as we were all starving.  Then we got shown our beds; 2 very uncomfortable sofa beds for 4 guys.  Bonding time!  Before we went to bed we all broke out laughing.  We couldn’t believe that our night ended with us sleeping at our landlord’s father-in-law’s apartment.  Something that can happen in Ukraine, but probably not in Canada.  It was something I will never forget.

landlord's apt
On our landlord’s father-in-law’s balcony having a good laugh.

These two stories have shown me how hard it is to be in a foreign country when you don’t speak the language and how hard it must be for immigrants in Canada (or anywhere) who don’t speak much English and who are overwhelmed by the culture shock.  These people are truly courageous to take it on.  I have learned a lot about Ukraine and about myself.  When I come home I will have a new perspective on this world.  Right now I am off to a 5 day trip to Krakow, Poland; details to follow.

Until then,

Ahren

homemade perogies
Homemade perogies are heavenly.  It will be hard eaten frozen ones back home.

posted by marc tytus    posted on 28.10.08 Baby corn scares the shit out of me.

I made a great, tasty mix of different vegetables with chicken and noddles, and other crap today, and I did my best to avoid ANY baby corn. It was definitely a conscious decision, but one I forgot about until I was almost finished my bowl.

Sitting at the bottom, among some chickpeas and celery, was an ear of baby corn. I think I may have made an audible gasp when it caught my eye. A mutant! What the hell is that thing… lying on its side, awkwardly looking up at me. I did my best to avoid touching it with my fork. I’m sorry but eating baby corn is like eating an aborted corn fetus.

posted by marc tytus    posted on 25.10.08 Vidblog?

Sorry for the huge amount of video posts lately and lack of essays. I think the posted videos are unique and definitely worth watching, but they’re not the focus of this site.

I know I can also speak for Mike as well when I say our intentions with this blog was to make it more about writing than anything else. I like the photos, links and videos a lot too, but I feel like the site is more our own when it is full of our unique, hopefully interesting content that one can’t find anywhere else.

Be vocal in the comments though, as you, the audience, have some say in this too. Some say.

posted by marc tytus   posted on 25.10.08

Wassup 2008.

Eight years ago I was twelve-years-old and in elementary school! The “wassup” commercial was huge… one of those pioneering viral videos. Tons of parodies. I can remember the Half-Life one in particular.

Wassup 2008 is a cool video made by the guys who were originally in the first commercial. I think they got together independently without the endorsement of the original company (which was…. Budweiser?) I watched this video yesterday so I can’t remember now how political this is.

posted by marc tytus   posted on 24.10.08

“Baby” (via Vimeo)

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